COSMIC NOTE TO SELF: Stop Chasing Friendships, Dreams, and Boys

Stop chasing friendships, dreams, and boys—instead, shine so bright from within your own halo of joy, your own truth, that what is meant for you knows where to find you. I really needed to hear this this week. So many things are changing around me and sometimes it’s just so hard to keep moving forward, to keep GROWING.

I want to cling onto the things that had brought me comfort. But I’m realizing that those things just keep me stuck. Life is embracing and letting go. And the most important thing is to keep nourishing you. The brighter you shine, the easier it is for what is meant for you to find you.

COSMIC NOTE TO SELF: Put On Your Own Oxygen Mask First

This is the first drawing I’ve been able to do, not just in 2022, but after what feels like a really long time. It wasn’t that I was out of ideas. I had this idea in my head for weeks. But I wasn’t listening to my own advice. Just like the girl in the drawing, I wasn’t putting on my own oxygen mask first.

Since the beginning of the year, I feel like this message has gotten louder, to the point where I can’t ignore it anymore. And I know that I’m not the only one. I think as women, we’re often taught that our roles are more important than caring for ourselves. A lot of us are taught to “think of others.” In Asian culture, it’s often seen as selfish to think of yourself. I think it’s good to think about other people, but I feel like we all need to do that—not just women. By understanding where others are at and who they are, we have a chance of building a more compassionate society.

But as women, myself included, putting ourselves first needs to be required rather than optional. I’m definitely a slow learner when it comes to caring for myself. I think it’s a challenge for creatives like me. When things are flowing, I just want to go, go, go. To hell with self care. But my body, my heart, and my mind know that this is not sustainable. I think the other issue women may have to deal with is guilt. I have parents who are in their eighties. Top that with a worldwide pandemic and I feel guilt every single time I have to say no. I can literally hear that voice inside my head that says, “a good daughter would do that for them.”

But I’m learning that if I don’t take care of me, I can’t do anything for anyone else. I hope you are learning that too. Cosmic Notes to Self. It’s like the universe’s version of a Post-It Note. Believe me, I need them.